Monday, October 27, 2014

"I Want to be Loved by You..."-Body Shaming

One day I came across a picture of a beautiful plus size model, that one of my favorite singers, Lzzy Hale posted. And the comments I read were unbelievable, comments along the lines of, "real women have curves," "I rather have a woman with curves than a skinny woman," or "Bones are for dogs." That was really hurtful to me, because I'm 5'2 and petite, I'm shaped exactly like my Mother. Unless you're dieting, to become a stick figure because that's your choice I and other women can control are body shapes. One of my favorite actresses, Audrey Hepburn was 110 pounds after WWII, she didn't try to be that way, she had an hour glass figure before the War but because of her hiding out and being malnourished her body was permanently altered. Women tried to diet to be as skinny as she was but she told them no that's how she was shaped due to the effects of war. Some women are an Audrey, others are a Marilyn or a Dottie (Dorothy Dandridge) and some are a Queen Latifah.

What others like is their choice, there are some men that only want a plus size woman, there are others that only want small framed women, and there are some that just don't care as long as a woman looks their way! Lol. But to put down a woman because of her natural size is wrong. I never liked the motto, "real women have curves." It has annoyed me since the movie came out, and even saying it a few times didn't fit me at all. The term, "real women" is now taking on a different meaning. Some say it's a woman that's completely natural, no makeup, real hair, etc. Others say it's a woman with confidence, smart and knows herself (which I agree with) and secure in her own skin. And some think as long as you can talk and move doesn't matter if you look like Barbie you're a "real woman." I think what's on the inside is what counts. If a woman wants to get implants and a tummy tuck that's her business, I don't think that makes her any less real. The Queen of Burlesque, the Goddess (what I call her), Dita von Teese has implants does that make her less real? Not in my book.

I know that people have their preference for what a "real woman" is but all sizes need love too. No matter what I do I will never be 5'8 nor will I be a size 12 with curves like Mae West or Marilyn Monroe. That's okay, God built me this way, but no dog will ever come after me because he likes bones, a real man will come to me because of the inside. And that's what it should be about I know you guys are visual creatures but I'm sure you will get bored real quick with a vain person rambling about herself and her looks. So no more body-shaming! You like what you like and keep your negative feelings to yourself.

xo Candace